All finished!

I'm home, and done with this blog. Didn't think it'd last this long. Now I'm here :P

Latika's Theme (Slumdog Millionaire)

As beautiful as the movie...

Eagle-Eye Cherry - Save Tonight

thank you
helen for perfect fifths
yau for the holga
hayley for an almond
gphong for the inspiration
zalo for season-appropriate headwear
aaron for being my bday buddy
sagar for the chocolate martini that destroyed my brain
sam, sabina, and roomies for initial cakes
dheepa and rachel for a smirnoff-brownie surprise
dinnercrew who paid for aaron&my italian dinner
to everyone who wished or called or texted or came last night

i've never had a better birthday :) despite the previous day's paper all-nighter and the following day's unparalleled hangover, everyone made this day an incredible end to an incredible semester... and now i'm going to stfu before i get really, REALLY sappy k

anyways, this is a pretty fawesome & appropriate song :)

The Weepies - Nobody Knows Me At All

Sometimes you just feel like that..

Nicole Kidman & Ewan McGregor - Come What May (Moulin Rouge)

This was my least-liked song in Moulin Rouge when I watched it for the first time in high school. But somehow I adore it now; maybe it's because Yau and Sam did a really hot rumba to it, maybe because I heard it nonstop for a month on the Boy's Mac, maybe it's because sometime between then and now I got a whole lot cheesier. Cheese cheese.

Now, this new scene is the scene where the sitar player writes a secret song for the courtesan. So that whatever is happening, no matter how bad things are, they remember their love...

The Cure - Pictures of You

Can't say much else but: very good, very emo song.

I've been looking so long at these pictures of you that I almost believe that they're real...

Peter Gabriel - In Your Eyes

Anyone who's watched Say Anything will know the iconic scene in which John Cusack, as lovelorn high-school deadbeat Lloyd Dobler, professes his love to Diane Court via boombox outside her bedroom window. This is the song he uses. Hopefully we can all look past its creepy music video and fall in love with this kid all over again.

And just for fun here's a live cover by Sara Bareilles.

I want to touch the light, the heat I see in your eyes

Michael Jackson - Whatever Happens

R.I.P. MJ

Sara Bareilles - City

More of her gorgeousness Sara -- live performance of City at the Fillmore in San Francisco. The thing I find so extraordinary about artists like her is that they're able to belt out their most personal thoughts to a stadium full of listeners. Imagine exposing your diary to several thousand people. Seriously! But I suppose that's what gives music that unparalleled ability to touch us...

Real version here. Btw the guitarist at 4:30 looks hilarious bahahah

In these deep city lights... girl could get lost tonight

Sara Bareilles - Vegas

I saw Sara Bareilles live at MIT last Saturday, and although I've always liked her for her catchy songs, I now love her -- for her spunk and for her incredible live performances. She's got one of those rare voices that sound so much better when not heard through a recording!

Gonna quit my job and move to New York,
Cause somebody told that's where dreams should go
Gonna quit my job and move to New York,
And tattoo my body with every Broadway show

The National - Santa Clara

And I'm gonna miss you so much.

Overheard in: Capogiro's

Tears for Fears - Head Over Heels

Donnie Darko, mangoes, gentle persuasion

Original video is here.

David Guetta & Chris Willis - Love is Gone

The perfect song to tearily lip-synch to while being blinded by strobe lights in a club.

Ben Folds Five - Alice Childress (on Naked Baby Photos)

In Freshman year, came for our school's Spring Fling concert and I waited nearly alone in the freezing cold for him for three hours because everyone I knew had gone home after Third Eye Blind finished. An hour to midnight he finally got onstage, and I swear the piano melodies were so captivating that each note took with it a piece of my loneliness as it echoed into nothingness in the night sky. Part by part, the pain evaporated, and despite all the crap of that first year I felt just happy singing my heart out to "Army" and looking like a lunatic doing so. But I didn't care. Happy makes you stop caring about a lot of inconsequential shit like that.

He did a concert at the school neighboring ours in Sophomore year, and I was ecstatic when my friend from there told me she'd get me a ticket. The afternoon of the concert, however, I decided that I desperately needed to study for my math final and had no choice but to skip -- so I expressed my regret to her over the phone, then turned my attention back to the textbook. Three hours later, she called me. "Hey. Just wanted to tell you that we just saw Ben Folds sitting on the grass with his kid, and we went over and chilled with him," she said nonchalantly over the phone. Still one of the biggest disappointments of my short, boring life. I failed the exam anyway.

Now it's Junior year and I have a chance to see him play live again: he's going to Boston for MIT's Spring Fling the same weekend we're going up there for the Open Ballroom Competition. It's like DESTINY. Bahahah. But I have a hugeass paper to write by Monday, which I'm obviously (and stupidly) neglecting at the moment. What do I do? Do I choose homework/GPA/future job prospects, or music?

Music was my refuge. I could crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness. -- Maya Angelou

Britney Spears - Circus

Before you throw the rotten tomatoes, let me just say that I am posting this because:

(1) This is not a blog for new or good or obscure music, it's a record of the songs I love and unfortunately I love this song,
(2) The jukebox in my head has it on continuous repeat and I think the cause is some Britney-sympathizing god out there exerting karmic punishment on me for unfairly refusing to post it, and
(3) As a former celebrity-gossip-monger and avid ONTD reader, I care deeply about this woman's personal life, her successes and failures, the status of her career. She's so fucking hot here I feel proud as a parent watching her daughter as the lead in the school play (and for some reason am advocating her overt sexuality? Ok. Bad analogy.)

Anyways. Fierce beyond fierce. Have two children and a public mental breakdown before telling me you do not admire this woman for making a full-on comeback.

The Fray - Without Reason

You want to work to spend to show
You want to talk to smile to feel
You want to run to thirst to drink
You want to love to know it's real

Jesus Christ, I have been alive for 7648 days and other than the day-to-day stuff like desire or anticipation or fear of death, I have NO clue what I am living for. On the random good days it feels like I'm destined for something great, but the other 99% of the days when I'm thinking straight I realize that I'm nowhere close because I just don't know what that something is. I guess that for the moment I live based upon the hope that one day I'll figure this out and my dreams will come true, whatever they are.

Mark of a dumb almost-21-year-old with hopeless prospects for employment.

Olivia Newton-John - Physical

In choosing this song my first instinct is to apologize for having retarded taste, but this really was a popular song once upon a time. In 1981, it was #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 charts for ten straight weeks. Back then people everywhere were humming its catchy tune and I've recently begun to as well, but my obsession is partly for the song's quality and partly for its kitschy appeal. I love it for the ridiculous video and the Sandy-turned-bad and the horrible 80's fashion, but I don't think I'm in the majority because I'm also the type of person who secretly loves shitty Chinese food, Hannah Montana, and fugly clothes -- all with the belief/knowledge that I shouldn't. So should I apologize? Maybe. But then the entire decade of 1980 should apologize, too.

Meiko - How Lucky We Are

And when that morning comes
I'll make coffee and you'll read the paper
We'll talk about our plans
And I'll keep saying how lucky we are

The Lonely Island (feat. T-Pain) - I'm On A Boat

Song of the year!

I got my swim trunks... and my flippie-floppies...

Guster - Barrel of a Gun

In honor of their appearance at this year's Spring Fling... :) awesomeness

Broken Social Scene - Swimmers

Okay Broken Social Scene. I was only three minutes late to class this morning... never say never, I'm gonna make it on time at least once before the semester ends.

Smashing Pumpkins - 1979

*The* defining moment of this song in my life is the morning after my NZ flatmate's legendary birthday party last summer; amidst the rubble & duct tape & morning sun, i heard this song play as we cleaned up and everything felt weirdly peaceful.

The street heats the urgency of sound
As you can see there's no one around

Lea Salonga - Sun and Moon (from Miss Saigon)

This is Lea Salonga's audition for the lead female part of Kim in the musical Miss Saigon. Lea did the voices of Jasmine from Aladdin and Mulan from Mulan and has the sweetest, most beautiful voice of any singer I've ever heard... gives me the chills :) And she's seventeen years old here!

If you want to skip past the audition-y part, they start singing at 1:30. Couldn't find a good version of the full song :( So I shall leave this video alone in all its unadulterated glory

You are sunlight and I moon
Joined by the gods of fortune
Midnight and high noon
Sharing the sky
We have been blessed, you and I

Justice - D.A.N.C.E.

I recall seeing this video over a year ago and disliking its music. Now I adore it... haha, my tastes turned slightly electronica yo :d

And LOVE those shirts... why can't clothing have animated graphics on them?

The Zombies - Time of the Season

Super oldie that I inexplicably had stuck in my head the entirety of my slothful afternoon at home. It was released in 1968 so I associate it with my parents' generation, but god, it has such a timelessness to it. Thanks FruiTunes (coz YT is filled with bad quality & bad covers :P)

It's the time of the season... when love runs high...

Love Paris (from Cliente)

I skipped class on Monday to spend a rainy afternoon downtown, eating chocolate ice cream and watching movies from the Philadelphia Film Festival :) One I watched was Cliente, a French film about a married male gigolo involved with a wealthy cougar. Hilarity ensued, of course... but had its serious bits too what with the deception and the toying with emotions, and this is where this song comes in.

My retention of high school French was enough to find this video but not enough to find the lyrics :P Oh and just for kicks here's the rap song from the film... hahaha. For some reason rap in other languages doesn't sound quite as badass :P

Inara George - Fools in Love

I need some metaphorical superglue.

Kyle Andrews - Sushi

Just discovered Kyle Andrews from here and after hearing the rest of his stuff had trouble choosing which I liked best! Eventually settled on the first track because it reflects my feelings on today's amazing Spring-y weather :) You can hear the rest of his album Real Blasty here.

i'm giving you a haircut
walking to the sushi bar
shopping at the goodwill
learning how to swing dance
and i sink so deep in you

The Bird and the Bee - Again and Again

Really creative music video that shows pretty much everything you can do with a Mac. Now pardon me, I think I ate some bad leftovers :P

Amy Winehouse - You Know I'm No Good

Hahah wtf at this video. Portrait of crazy women...

The Ting Tings - We Walk

I listened to The Ting Tings' We Started Nothing and Adele's 19 nonstop on the final 15-hour plane ride home after my New Zealand trip...

Listening to this makes me think of endings... :P

Aimee Mann - Save Me

We grow up hearing tales about the Prince Charming who saves the princess from the dragon-guarded tower, the superhero who saves civilians from a cliff-bound train, the god above who saves mortals from temptation. And maybe it's because the only serious advice I remember my mother giving me is to "never trust anyone but [myself]" or because I grew up in an atheistic household, but I'd never been able to accept stuff like this -- the hope that anyone, fictional or real, would swoop down and rescue me in my darkest moments. But by some unbelievable miracle, someone asked me what's wrong? and I actually told them. Despite the cynicism and the stubbornness. And my opinion on salvation is this:

You need to save yourself before you can let anyone else save you. Perhaps that means opening your heart or throwing away the shitload of pessimism and untrustworthiness you've developed over the years... maybe that means liking yourself for once... but unless you can accept that it's okay to be weak, okay to ask for help, and it's actually okay to trust someone other than yourself... you'll be left waiting on a hero that never steps out of the movie screen.

Adele - First Love

I'm getting obsessed with Adele again. This woman's voice is so powerful, pure... and sometimes, heartbreaking. Anyways, you could Viennese Waltz to this song :B I already want to choreograph next year's show pieces dammit

Feist - One Evening

I like that dress. And I love this song's seventies flavor... hahah, I could totally dance ceroc or a slow hustle to this. Mad chill yo. /poser

We were caught by the light
Held on to the day till it became ours
The minutes went by, the cab is outside
There's no time to take

When we parted, moving on
And believing it could begin and end in one evening

Rihanna feat. TI - Live Your Life

For Chicken Little dancing Numa Numa, for plbd parties in empty Raleigh homes, for the simple advice to just live your life.

Flight of the Conchords - Ladies of the World

Popped up on my iPod today and got really, really stuck in my head. Hahah. One of the catchiest FoTC songs imo.

Jon Brion - Little Person

We'll take a road trip way out west. You're the one that I like the best.

The Arcade Fire - Wake Up

Trailer for Where the Wild Things Are, a Spike Jonze adaptation of the children's book we all know and love. So epic, I can't wait to see it. Super hi-res version of trailer here; full Arcade Fire song here.

Children don't grow up
Our bodies get bigger but our hearts get torn up
We're just a million little gods causing rainstorms
Turning every good thing to rust

I guess we'll just have to adjust

Gregory and the Hawk / Kina Grannis - Boats and Birds

The first video is the original from Gregory and the Hawk, the second is a cover by YouTube celebrity Kina Grannis. I listened to the original nonstop during a tumultuous sophomore year so I hold it very close to my heart -- but the cover is so enchanting, I *almost* like it better. Almost.

Ratatat - Loud Pipes

Don't normally like wordless music but this is delicious.

Lady Gaga - Beautiful, Dirty, Rich

Because I saw Strictly Funk do an infuckingcredible performance to this song Saturday night and because I love Lady GaGa. I think the latter is mostly because of the line “how’d I turn my shirt inside out” in Just Dance… hahahah.

Stars - Sleep Tonight

we don't want to sleep tonight
still young like that i count the lines
beside your mouth that smiles now
my arms reach up as you go down
with buried heads we both forget
all of the past and its regret
wind picks up the window shakes
we won't hear the morning break

you will cry
and i will cry
because all the love's
alive tonight

(This is re-posted and edited from last year... felt like this song needed to be brought up again :) plus it fills in the gaps left from my posting laziness)

Sufjan Stevens - Casimir Pulaski Day

All the glory when you ran outside
With your shirt tucked in and your shoes untied
And you told me not to follow you...

Finley Quaye & William Orbit - Dice

Old song from The O.C. (shush I liked it :P) stuck in my head this morning during Physics.

The Bird and the Bee - Last Day of Our Love

The Submarines - Brightest Hour

Wandering through starry skies
And when tomorrow's day arrives
I'll be a moment closer to the
Brightest hour here with you

One step closer, getting brighter
One step closer, getting brighter

Bell X1 - Rocky Took A Lover

Been away in Raleigh North Carolina internet-less on a yacht; now back at Penn for the rest of Spring Break. Mixed blessing because I miss the sun & silliness & the ocean, but at the same time I'm glad to be home and chilling with my bro who's in town for the weekend!

Bell X1 is playing at World Cafe Live in Philadelphia tonight, Friday the 13th at 7:30pm. Tickets range from $19 ~ $26 (and we're going :D)

I'll shine for you, then I'll burn for you.
I can shine for you... that's what I'll do

Radiohead - Karma Police

Thom Yorke looks like a fetus in the video snapshot :P

A note

I've moved to Tumblr for personal posts (link on facebook)

Joanna Newsom - The Sprout And The Bean

Something about this song has me captivated. Prepare yourself for harp and a truly unique voice.

And as I said,
I slept as though dead
dreaming seamless dreams of lead.

Punjabi MC - Jogi / Mundain To Bach Ke

Coz in addition to Girl Talk, this weekend I saw both Dhamaka and Masti -- two freaking amazing South Asian dance troupes at our school (the latter of which my roomie is in! :D)

I love how there's a comment at 0:46 on the first video that says "he isn't samuel l. jackson" bahah

Girl Talk - Bounce That

This is the epitome of anti-study music and I have something due online in 1 hour 16 minutes... :)

The Shins - New Slang

You gotta hear this one song. It'll change your life, I swear. - Sam, Garden State

This statement does not express the views of the poster. Not liable for life that refuses to change.

Heart - Magic Man

Was sitting in Copabanana when this song came over the speakers. I first heard it while watching The Virgin Suicides, which was one of my favorite movies in high school -- so damn emo now that I think of it. It still sits on my shelf, more for aesthetic reasons than anything, but I kind of want to see it again.

Natalie Portman's Shaved Head - Sophisticated Side Ponytail

Do not watch this if you're the slightest bit seizure-prone

M.I.A. - Jimmy

In indirect honor of Slumdog Millionaire, which at the Academy Awards last night won best picture, director, original score, original song, adapted screenplay, cinematography, film editing, and sound mixing. Okay, so all M.I.A. did was contribute a few songs to the soundtrack (not including Jimmy--it was Paper Planes and O... Saya, which was also nominated for an Oscar but lost against the film's other nominated song Jai Ho), but... I was just looking for an excuse to post this song.

Spirit fingers!

Yumeji's Theme (In The Mood For Love)

From Wong Kar-Wai's 2000 film In the Mood For Love, which has breathtaking cinematography, a haunting soundtrack, and unreasonably hot protagonists who unnervingly remind me of my hot grandparents, who were young and married in 1960s Taiwan.

It is a restless moment. She had kept her head lowered to give him a chance to come closer. But he could not, for lack of courage. She turns and walks away.

As Tall As Lions - Love, Love, Love (Love, Love)

Posted this before but I still adore it :/

Goldfrapp - Happiness

This is what I would do if I achieved happiness. And had spring-loaded knees.

MGMT - Time to Pretend

I'm so flipping frustrated that all of MGMT's music videos on Youtube have disabled embedding :( so here is a mild, un-trippy slideshow. The real version, like most MGMT vids, makes me feel like I'm doing some mad hallucinating; I bet this stuff could undo all the anti-drug work DARE and Truth have done for a person in a second. Its unconventionality (read: rampant freakiness) and high Message Sensation Value (seizure-inducing rainbow show) appeal so much to high sensation-seekers, aka the people who are most susceptible to regular substance abuse, that I'm sure it'd wipe out any trace of the anti-drug education they received in sixth grade (i.e. the DARE song: D, I won't do drugs! A, won't have an attitude! R, I... ooh, rainbows.)

Am writing a painfully low-sensation paper for my Comm&Persuasion class on anti-drug campaigns targeted toward adolescents, thus I must seek out electronic mental stimulation lest I fall asleep. Three pages to go...

Iron and Wine - My Lady's House

no hands are half as gentle
or firm as they like to be
thank god you see me the way you do
strange as you are to me

Peter Bjorn and John - Amsterdam

The song I put on repeat when I'm feeling the way I do now...

Somehow Swedish indie and baby plants from Planet Earth make it alllll better.

Does It Offend You, Yeah? - Dawn of the Dead

I may or may not have been sitting here waiting for midnight to strike so I could make this post. If I were cool enough to have the word "rad" in my vocabulary, I would use it to describe this song. Oh well. RAD RAD RAD :D

Iron and Wine - Boy With A Coin

The Darkness - I Believe in a Thing Called Love

I believe in a thing called looooooolololo-*heavy-metal-tongue-thrashing*-lolove!!

Karaoke and Radler at the Bowler. 2am & jamming out falsetto in an 18th-floor room. This song is as fabulous as the lead singer's sparkly spandex pants.

M83 - Kim and Jessie

Real music video

I really don't know what to make of this video (prepare yourself for a quintuple girl-on-girl crotch shot at 2:15), but I adore the song & can't stop listening to it :)

Praan - Gary Schyman (Where the Hell is Matt?)

I never thought I could be so moved by a guy doing a stupid jig... haha... this is damn amazing. Matt is this self-proclaimed "deadbeat" from Connecticut, yet he managed to travel to 42 countries in 14 months and get thousands of people, despite cultural and linguistic barriers, to do this simple thing we all understand--dance. Retardedly. Let go. And just smile. =)

Make sure to go to the actual YouTube page and click "watch in HD" below-left the video. It's so hi-res my inner geek is swooning.

The song is "Praan," by Gary Schyman. According to Matt its lyrics come from a Bengali poem written by Nobel Prize winning author Rabindranath Tagore.

The same stream of life
Runs through my veins night and day
Runs through the world
And dances in rhythmic measures.

I want to be him when I grow up! :[

Rufus Wainwright / Fiona Apple - Across The Universe

Words are flying out like
endless rain into a paper cup
They slither while they pass
They slip away across the universe
Pools of sorrow waves of joy
are drifting thorough my open mind
Possessing and caressing me

Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world

Nom nom nom

Anya Marina - Move You (Slow and Steady Seduction Phase II)

Number #3 most played song! Because I've been in Platt for the last 8 hours for ballroom doing show rehearsals and practicing and loitering and I generally don't like bmusic unless I'm dancing to it so you get this instead. Pardon the Private Practice video... the real mv on YouTube is a weird produced version I don't like as much :P

Btw was really disappointed by the 2-hour Grey's/PP thing last night... didn't even watch the second half...

Daniel Powter - Am I Still The One

Didn't know DPouter was this intense, maybe this was the cause of his bad day? Cause of my bad day: went sleepless last night so I could spend time getting intimate with Gaussian surfaces but failed the quiz anyway (it was one of those exams with q's that built upon the other and I got the first one wrong :D) ; spent the rest of day being scary and zombified. Reasons to still be happy: it's the weekend and I am watching The Office on Hulu. I got a haircut for 16 bucks and now it's uber short and Rihanna-esque. I tried on neon tribal clothes from the clearance racks of Urban Outfitters all afternoon for a cheap laugh. I exercised my parentless freedom by eating oatmeal for breakfast, European drinking chocolate for lunch (it's like a cup of hot Hershey's syrup), free & guacamole-smothered hors d'oeuvres from an animation seminar for dinner, and Chocolate Turtle Chex Mix for supper.

And, um, idk what's up with the extinction video... it's appropriately emo I guess, but not exactly the first thing I'd think of hahah

The Bird and the Bee - Polite Dance Song

I've never before seen a near-riot over the destruction of a 7-foot snow bunny...

Slightly disturbing if you don't like seeing elderly people backing their thangs up.

Chester French - She Loves Everybody

All I know about Chester French: (1) They were formed by Harvard students, (2) band member Max Drummey married the 19-year-old Peaches Gedolf in Vegas last year, and (3) Pharrell Williams is obsessed with them. Now I am going to repent for my poor academic behavior. How I managed to sleep through an entire 90-minute physics lecture after gulping a tall coffee... I still don't understand.

Blue - All Rise

I was going to post some pretentious hipster music but then I got all nostalgic about travelling and non-skeezy male artists and had to put this up. Because we all need some Boy Band in our life sometimes yeah? It was a tough choice between this and One Love but I felt that this one ultimately trumped OL in lametardedness. <3

Hahah. I cannot believe this was cool once. But it's damn catchy... I feel like dancing in a synchronized formation now.

Oren Lavie - Her Morning Elegance

Another amazingly creative video... I love the part with the scarf, and when she falls into the water.... that's some sweet stop-motion. And the song's not bad either :)

She fights for her life
As she puts on her coat
And she fights for her life on the train
She looks at the rain as it pours
And she fights for her life
As she goes in a store
With a thought she has caught by a thread
She pays for the bread
And she goes...
Nobody knows

Vampire Weekend - A-Punk

Haha this is a cute video!

Meiko - Boys with Girlfriends

Living is so tiring to me. Maybe it's the way I allocate my time that exhausts me so quickly--recently I've been inserting blue boxes into every white space on my Google Calendar without taking into account how much ballroom exhausts me or how much time I need to get ready or where I need to leave time to breathe. People at Penn impress me so much with their work hard, play hard mentality and how they manage to keep it all together through it all (or at least keep a reasonable front). They seem to able to make Monday classes with hangovers, get straight-As yet not be one of those studious "missing" people.

In New Zealand, things were all about meeting people and exploring which was absolutely awesomely relaxing. But as evidenced by the independent project I took up and the winter job search and the side work I started on my portfolio while I was there, something in my nature stops me from sitting still for long periods of time. I constantly need to push myself, I need to be better... I need to go out on Fridays yet I need to work on my demo reel alone tonight. But unlike most of my peers, living this double life is way-y-y beyond my capacity. So I end up stretching myself out until the breaking point and I dissolve into a blubbery mess over existential/quarter-life crisis of-the-month. It's almost as routine as my menstrual cycle. (OH MY GOD. Correlation. Haha.)

I can't stop. I can't stop wanting even though it's wearing me down. And I know it's a stretch to say I'll never truly be happy chasing my desires 'round and 'round, but it really scares the shit out of me to think that there's so end in sight. It almost makes me want to give up now and sleep for the next twenty years. Except I'd wake up all pissy everyone else got their degrees and dream careers while all I accomplished was... nothing... I can't even stand the thought. That's not happiness to me. Somehow, idle happiness is not happiness to me.

How do you do it, summa cum laude fraternity boy? How do you take seven classes, ballroom dancer? Where do you find the extra time and energy--and how much are you willing to sell it to me for?

MIA - Ten Dollar

I'm feeling inordinately pissy right now. The carrot-cake-flavoured Clif Bar I'm eating has real bits of carrot & looks like one of those rubber gag barf splatters. Ballroom sucks. I am growing horizontally. Don't want to study for Physics tomorrow.

What can I get for ten dollar? Anything you want.

Junior Boys - In The Morning / Daft Punk - Technologic

I don't know what happened to me between the last fourteen years of my education and this semester, but all of a sudden I'm making it to my early-morning class consistently on time. Every time the fifth alarm on my cell phone rings at 8:30am I'm certain I won't think consciously again until I awake with a start four hours later, but then I surprise myself by dashing down the stairs and making it. And staying alert and interested throughout 90 minutes of lecture.

I'm sort of scaring myself.

What brings me to Annenberg two 9ams a week is a class called Communication and Persuasion, taught by Professor Cappella--yeah, I'm trying to learn their names now. *(When I took Physics I didn't realize my prof was Hollebeek and not Fortune for, eh, a month or so...) This is a boring topic for someone completely uninterested in advertising, politics, or anything that requires this manipulative skill, but the lecturer makes it interesting in the way he speaks and presents his points. I've had too many teachers (unfortunately in compsci, math, and other technical fields) that don't speak well or don't engage their class in the topic, and because of this I inevitably lose interest and stop attending class at all. And he's very clear, which I realize is important when I place him next to my engaging but hard-to-follow World Film prof (he throws in so much film jargon that goes way over my head). He's making me freakishly excited about formulating a Health PSA to practice persuasion techniques; he even makes me want to raise my hand in a big lecture class. He shows the Colbert Report and Blagojevich interviews in class that are entertaining yet intregal in my understanding of his examples. This is really a good teacher. For once, I feel like I'm doing good in spending (as my one-time Biology prof informed us) the $4000 we do per class at Penn.

Rediscovering Van Pelt in between lectures while rediscovering So You Think You Can Dance music from 2007 while avoiding Physics. I haven't been a good student since college, a straight-A student since 9th grade, a top student since 6th when I moved from near-rural Massachusetts to the Three Village School District. I know grades are all relative, but I wonder if I can make this education worth it after two years of slacking off.

Listening: Junior Boys - In The Morning (this song is so hot, in a sleazy way) | Daft Punk - Technologic (after the Humans are Dead robots will go clubbing to this song)

Lou Reed - Perfect Day

This is your brain... this is your brain on drugs. While hobbling to Student Health this afternoon every song on my iPod seemed too loud, too fast, too offensive... except for this one! Fever-head manifested as a melody sounds like this. Lalala.

Just a perfect day
You made me forget myself
I thought I was someone else
Someone good

Stars - Your Ex-Lover Is Dead

This is one of my favororororitest songs of all time--it's so pretty I can't describe it in words, you'll have to listen for yourself. A friend of mine introduced it to me in freshman year, during which I remember many nights listening to it on my iPod, lying awake in bed and thinking. Strangely happy memories :)

I am gluttonously devouring a tub of cereal and blogging. Too much dance and class and sickness and deadline-ness there's no time to breathe. And think. And happily become a fattie.

Aretha Franklin - My Country Tis Of Thee / Itzhak, Yo-Yo, co. - Air & Simple Gifts

Aretha and her gargantuan bow

Yo-Yo Ma is so smiley :D

MGMT - The Youth

Wtf is up with the glittery hipster children in this video? I never liked this song but it got very stuck in my head for no reason on Saturday.

This is a call of arms to live and love and sleep together
We could flood the streets with love or light or heat whatever
Lock the parents out, cut a rug, twist and shout
Wave your hands
Make it rain
For stars will rise again

The youth is starting to change
Are you starting to change?
Are you?
Together, together, together, together...

Chopin Ballade No. 1 (from The Pianist)

Kind of want to see this movie again.

Elliott Smith - Son of Sam

Kind of satisfying song for a day spent lost in the disastrous NYC weekend subway system, dodging unwanted inquiries about my marriage plans from creepy men, waiting around in the cold to avoid being stalked by said creepy men, being stranded in a sketchy area of Queens, realizing the extent of my ballroom regression, feeling highly uncomfortable contemplating racism, finding metal shavings in my already crappy diner pasta, and functioning on three one-hour pockets of sleep I got last night because the apartment is so hot it parched my throat to hell and repeatedly woke me up.

Bleh.

Ben Folds - Smoke

Double Feature! Because I'm trying to compensate for not being able to find "Alice Childress" on YouTube, here are two versions of "Smoke." The first was performed in 1997 with Ben Folds Five on a series called Sessions at West 54th, and the second was done in 2005 with the Western Australian Symphony Orchestra. Neither mimics the studio version on Whatever and Ever Amen, yet both have their unique charm--the first because it's so raw, unpolished, and honest; the second because it simply sends chills down my spine.

So sleepy don't wanna go to MAC. =P

Sessions at West 54th


Western Australian Symphony Orchestra

Flight of the Conchords - The Most Beautiful Girl

This has inexplicably been stuck in my head all day... maybe all week. You're so beautiful, like a... tree... or a high-class prostitute. I constantly have the urge to blurt out lines from this song at inappropriate moments...

I just went with one of my roommates (I almost said flattie) to stand in line at the opening of Chipotle on Walnut Street and it's damnnnn cold. The line stretched halfway down the block and by the time I got my free burrito an hour later my toes were frozen and I could only c-walk home. Now I am sitting on top of my heater that is turned up to 85 degrees because I've decided to take full advantage of the services Rodin provides and who am I to say no to free stuff? This might also go well with the free leftovers I pilfered from people who don't finish their meals.

Hooray for only one class on Thursdays, a nice view, snow flurries I can watch floating by my 13th floor window but don't have to walk in. Hooray.

Mazzy Star - Into Dust

I can't fall asleep. Before Melatonin and the prevalence of wireless internet in laptops, which together made my insomnia seem a little less daunting, late at night when I couldn't sleep I'd do what I was doing five minutes ago: staring at the lights on my ceiling. It's a rare sight nowadays, that blank corner at the top of the room decorated with illuminated stripes let in by the blinds. This scene is a faded memory of countless other sleepless nights in my life, all important in my mind... because nowadays I never see the ceiling lights anymore unless I've just gone to a new place and haven't yet settled into the routine of escaping online. After the commotion of moving subsides and leaves me nothing but darkness and quiet, I start to think. And everything begins sinking in.

I remember being scared that first night in Dunedin, where the cold repeatedly jolted me awake to sight of yellow streetlamps flooding into my too-large room. I remember my first night in New York this past winter, the blinds letting rows of light into my cousin's shoebox apartment, the excitement that came with being there. Sansom and the curtains that prevented the dim glow of the city from entering the dorm, how I felt when viewing them from below. My first night at home, in near-complete darkness. Moments long ago when I crawled into my parents' bed after being scared by some bump in the night and felt safe between the sheets watching the headlights of passing cars roll across our ceilings and walls.

This is my first time sleeping in Rodin 13, the last few hours before class begins again, and the first time since I've come to Philadelphia that I've felt comfortable, really comfortable, with my being here. Just another ceiling-light memory I'll remember for the next time.

MGMT - Electric Feel

Because 115 plays (not counting the ones in the car, on CTV, or on YouTube) and 5 months later, I am still obsessed with this song.

(I don't know wtf is up with this video but I couldn't find a version of the actual one that would let me embed. Here's the real one... it's like LOTR + LSD... and almost as addictive as the song itself haha.)

Snow Patrol - The Golden Floor

Back! Tired. Love new roommates already. Nearly spent the last twenty-four hours in bed. Nervous about school. MAC this weekend aaaaaaaaah.

Songs with clapping in them = yay.

Death Cab for Cutie - The New Year

Only three resolutions this year...

1. Look beyond myself: in relationships and friendships, in my very spoiled and privileged life, but most of all when it comes to family matters.
2. Be dedicated, passionate, and focused about the things I do. This not only includes being a good student but also sticking to my word when I decide to achieve something.
3. And the obligatory but futile: don't be a fatass.

I can't believe I'm returning to Philadelphia. The entirety of last year's Spring semester was spent holed up in my room researching and applying and studying so I could escape this place--and after all that, I'm finally going back. I'm nervous as fuck. The escape that my parents and the engineering school mercifully granted brought me to the other side of the world and back, made me mature more than I thought possible, and gave me the best year of my life thus far. No amount of thanks could fully express my gratitude for the opportunity I had to experience white sands, southeast Asia, Meeting the Parents, Spice Girls, Kiwi hospitality, endless green hills at the edge of the ocean, friends across the globe, Darling Harbour, night market labyrinths, becoming a New Yorker, all this time at home. I am grateful I was given a clean slate and the chance to figure out how to be happy--four years ago, my defeatist self never ever thought it possible. It's been a mind-blowing, life-changing six month vacation... and now the vacation's over.

Going back to school, I feel like I have to repent for all the mistakes I made in frosh and soph years, as well as work extra hard to make up for all the money I spent jetting around the globe. I'm so nervous I just popped an entire sheet of bubble wrap. But I'm excited too. Yeah, there still stands that crippling fear that my moodiness was situational and as soon as I come back to the stress and competition of school it'll become clear that nothing has really changed and I'll go back into hiding, but... I'm determined not to let that happen. Hope it won't. I guess I'm mainly excited to see how this semester plays out, even if I fail miserably.

This is even more affecting than my first step back on U.S. soil (I spent two hours afterwards chatting cheerfully to my parents like I returned from a week summer camp) or even New Year's (despondent and so out of it I only remember 2 of the last 10 seconds of 08). So even more than November 15th or January 1st, today is the beginning of my new year. Things are gonna be different whether or not I want them to be.

Doves - Caught By The River

Top Ten Winter Moments (in no particular order):

1) Covering Switchfoot, Taking Back Sunday, and The Spill Canvas songs late into the night with Mike and Kev. Thinking up vocal arrangements and harmonies to Kevin's guitar, then recording and performing them for our parents the next day. My childhood friends/two extra bros! We've known each other since before we could talk. TRY.

2) Discovering our retard alter-egos in an epic game of Psychiatrist. Aid... us? H...... H.... rocks! Zoo! Platypus! Shunnnnn. Hitting on Alex and dying when he didn't give us enough attention. Horrible impressions of each other. Everything having to do with cocks. And let's throw Bill Clinton in for good measure, too.

3) The real life version of Lou Reed's Perfect Day was pretty much like this: quest for Magnolia cupcakes, panda porn in the Museum of Sex, ice skating lessons in Central Park, DIY noodles in Chinatown, talking over crappy bubble tea.

4) New Year's Eve, which I hardly remember.

5) Sporadic midnight McDonald's runs: fogged breath and french fries on the hood of Tom's car. Yes we're going to get fat off the Dollar Menu. Yes, it's all about the h-o-n-e-y m-USTARD. Yes, the frozen fingers were extremely worth it.

6) A deep conversation with Eric in Red Lobster. He never fails to amaze me with unwavering support, meal-utensil clumsiness, and sage advice. The cow brunch place, Speed Racer, bululup! ahhh I'm going to miss my big bro.

7) Mistakes. Honesty. Revelations. Growing up a little bit. All at the hands of a little device that I'm told could give me brain cancer, but that's okay.

8) Talking about boys and nude photography with a certain relative of mine over The Princess Bride. And then cuddling because her shoebox of an apartment isn't large enough for a guest futon. My (second) cousin is basically the older sister I never had--she even curled my hair before work!

9) That moment I looked around at our ragtag group of friends and realized how much I'm going to miss them and our fun times on this boring island. Some of these friendships are eight years and going, some feel like they barely started, yet when somebody says Remember that time...? we ALL remember and it's too hilarious to handle.

10) Visiting Penn and realizing I didn't feel as out of place as I thought I would.

OneRepublic - Say (All I Need)

I said, all I need is the air I breathe and a place to rest my head.

Rilo Kiley - Close Call

Posting a song is becoming a mini-highlight of my day. Throughout the morning I've been perusing my iPod and weighing my choices and now I finally get to post it woot. So. Close Call? I don't quite connect with the meaning of this song but the way it sounds totally matches how I felt yesterday. It's amazing to me that although I can't even begin to explain or categorize that emotion, a melody and a beat does it perfectly. I find that to be the beauty of music.

PS I hate olives. My liver hurts. It's my last day at work. I can't wait to get home.

Flight of the Conchords - Bret, You've Got It Going On

I woke up with this song stuck in my head. Anyways, totally random but I keep passing by or looking up these places but haven't gone... causing this list to pile up in my head:

- Ayza Wine & Chocolate Bar (expensive but wine+chocolate=heaven)
- That Japanese place (on St. Marks that has after-meal self-serve cotton candy and a scary bear statue in the front... donno the name)
- Pinkberry (because I've been to Red Mango and was disappointed at the limit of only three!! flavors)
- Tacky Indian Restaurant on the top-left (cause out of the four TIRs there I went to Panna II on the top-right, pictured, and heard the top-left was tackier)
- Chinatown Ice Cream Factory
- Momofuku Noodle Bar (great ramen but has bad reviews?)
- Magnolia Bakery (again, to eat the heavenly white-chocolate macadamia cheesecake and because I didn't get to try the cupcakes last time)

Ryan Adams - Wonderwall

All the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
But I don't know how

Because maybe... you're gonna be the one who saves me
And after all... you're my wonderwall

edit: i reallyreallycannot stop listening to this song. reasons for this would be (1) i'm learning it on the guitar :D (2) i keep flashing back to the seth/summer scene in season 1 (3) it's so damn beautiful yo

Umbrellas - Ships

1. Umbrellas - Ships 204
   
2. Stars - One More Night (Your Ex-Lover Remains Dead) 168
3. Goo Goo Dolls - Here Is Gone 162
   
4. Anya Marina - Move You (Slow & Steady Seduction Phase II) 159
   
5. Umbrellas - The City Lights 152
   
6. Stars - Your Ex-Lover Is Dead 139
   
7. Death Cab For Cutie - Photobooth 138
   
8. KT Tunstall - Other Side Of The World 137
   
9. Athlete - Tourist 132
   
10. Eagle-Eye Cherry - Save Tonight 132
    
11. Rilo Kiley - Dreamworld 132
    
12. KT Tunstall - Universe & U 128
    
13. Rilo Kiley - Portions For Foxes 127
    
14. Death Cab For Cutie - Summer Skin 126
    
15. Goo Goo Dolls - Slide 125
    

I've lost my blogging mojo for the moment--I think that until I figure out how to act with a little more care and consideration, this will become a boring music blog. Hopefully 2009 will be filled with fewer words and overcomplications, more singing.

These are the top 15 songs (and play counts) on my iTunes playlist. Observations: The only new entries since 2007 are #4/11/13. Ben Folds is strangely not on this list. This is heavily Grey's-influenced. #1 has unwaveringly retained its place at the top ever since I discovered it freshman year even though I could swear I never listen to it any more. Yay Umbrellas! Companion on late nights with bright screens--you're so lovably emo.

Just like ships, we float through each other's lives
Through the waters of beauty and grace
We will one day dock at the same port
And give rest to our weary legs
There is a light placed up in the sky
Like the stained glass, time slows down
I wish I could sleep, I wish I could dream
I love the sound of my feet against these empty streets
I saw the whole town burn down
I'm walking away
Nothing stays, these feelings have wings
Our arms outstretched, we are soaring